And the all time winner of the Random Acts of Guy-ness Award goes to...

Hi,
I want to preface this with an author's note, from me, the author.

This post was originally written in 2009? maybe? However, after I wrote this blog I recieved threatening texts which stated "Be prepared for personal and possibly legal implications". So I've removed all references to the actual names and people wo were invovled. Except for me ofcourse. I've never been happy about having to remove a post--out of fear--which was very theraputic for me. So here it is...Again.

Sometime in 2009...
 
...Well, I don't have many followers but I know there are some out there that don't respond but here's an update on an oldie post but is a real goodie "Random Acts of Guy-ness."

If you read Random Acts of Guy-ness I: The Original Inflictions, you may remember that is my catalog of the worst human male acts upon the female gender that I have personally witnessed.

In English, it's the damn stupid stuff guys think is okay to do to me just because I'm pretty, nice, and blonde (Someone needs to tell them that doesn't make me dumb).

Anyway so here it is. My BFF and I discussed me writing this for therapy after I had maybe the most bizarre morning ever since I moved to NYC. Here it goes, you get to read my therapy session.

ALL-TIME WINNER OF RANDOM ACTS OF GUY-NESS AWARD:
HE WHO MUST NOT BE IDENTIFIED (because I might receive threatening letters, texts, etc)


[Original photograph removed]

DON'T: Fake CANCER to hide your girlfriend of 5 years.
Yes, ladies and gents this is true I couldn't make this up if I tried. I will explain how this doesn't work to attract ladies, keep ladies and it fails to make them happy in any way.

I met [He Who Must Not Be  Identified] at [my place of work in 2004?] and never imagined he was the type to lie about having cancer or the type to cheat on multiple women. I thought he was sweet and kind. I was young.

I'm 27 [older] now and I met him when I was 24 and dated him on and off for about 2 and a half years. Anyway the math is very important for this story and 27-24=3 years. Okay that was easy, now remember 3 years.

Well one morning on my way to the dentist to get a "robot tooth (ie. some serious shit done)" I got a phone call. It was from a 212 number which means NYC and I thought "maybe work forgot I had a dentist appointment." I answered and a woman's voice on the other end said "Hello Kate, this is Rose" (name changed to protect her identity). I didn't know who Rose was so I said "Rose from where? I'm sorry I'm not sure I know who you are." She responded "Rose, [He Who Must Not Be Identified 's] girlfriend of five years? I live with him?"

Pause: Okay so back to the math equation..  [He Who Must Not Be  Identified] was dating Rose for 5 years... and I started dating him 3 years ago 5-3=oh crap.

Needless to say, I did not know that I ever dated a man that had a girlfriend. I have been cheated on a few times in the past and I know how bad it hurts, I would never do that to another girl knowingly. NEVER!

Anyway, Rose and I started talking because I figured out the math part very quickly and realized that "wow I was 'the other woman.' " I don't really remember much of our chat, I think I'm still a bit dazed by the revelation, but I do remember that I told her that we had broke it off a while ago and I was actually seeing someone else now. However, we did date for a very long time.

I guess she had found out about me a while ago and  [He Who Must Not Be Identified] was supposed to break up with me then. As we talked I realized that about six months after I met  [He Who Must Not Be Identified] at [my place of work in 2004?] he had told me that he had cancer and said that I would be better off without him because he was going to die. Well to make a long story short...we still dated for another 2 years after that before it finally ended for good.

I was pretty floored when  [He Who Must Not Be  Identified] told me he had cancer and was going to die. I felt bad, no terrible. I donated money to Livestrong, and preached to my friends about how important it is to make sure you stay healthy. I was very affected by knowing my "boyfriend" at the time had cancer.

Well, I guess I can breathe easy now, cuz Rose confirmed that it was all a big fat lie. And I figured it was  [He Who Must Not Be  Identified's] ingenious way of hiding Rose's existence from me while giving him an excuse to be MIA for days at a time. Whew, I was all worried about nothing! Haha silly me.

I guess if anything I can be happy that he is not dying of cancer.

tip: Lying about having cancer is really bad karma. Really bad, I wouldn't recommend it as a way to hide your current girlfriend from a new one.

What's new pussy cat?

Well it's been a while blog. and have I missed you? well yeah, actually, I think I have.

There is not much use in catching up but starting over will be appropriate. 

I would love to introduce you to the newest member of my family... Gerard Tibbington or #GerardTibbington. 

So yup that's what's up for now. I'm due some posts about a recent trip with my parents and there will be The Best of Amsterdam in a month (which I'm stoked about!!!)

Peace for now.

Trips Down Memory Lane… At Midnight!

Tonight I told Jim that "I’m just a very impatient person. I don’t have patience for sleep and that’s why I can just go right to sleep, no problem". Well that backfired on me. 

I’m sat awake with what I call ‘Mom syndrome’. Let me explain…

For as long as I can remember, my mother—Mrs. Fischer—was awake late at night and then up as early as possible in the morning. I actually think she has never slept and perhaps she just slumbers. She has what she calls ‘The Catholic Guilt’.

I guess different generations call it different things. Anyway the symptoms of ‘Mom Syndrome/Catholic Guilt’ are not being able to sleep because you A) Forgot to return a library book or pay a bill, B) Remember that old friend you haven’t been in touch with lately and are just a bit curious as to where they are, C) Are trying to sort out ALL of your lives problems before nodding off. And for some reason this only happens while falling asleep.

Maybe it’s because I spoke with my dad today. Or could it be that I’ve picked up some strange mom sympathy sleepless-ness since it’s US mother’s day on Sunday?  Regardless, I’m remembering people I haven’t been in touch with for a while and I’m thinking about them as well as reminiscing on times and places.

Not to brag, but I have been having a pretty fun and very interesting life. I’ve met so many people in different places and times of my life and I have LOVED almost all of it. If you are reading this and are one of them, I most likely do remember you and I do think of you.

You would not believe the random memories I have at random moments. I sometimes worry that I’m verging psychosis but I just play it off over here as “that Crazy American girl”. 

While I’m not trying to boast about my life but I’ll have a flash back to: a weekend in Chicago; a Van ride up to Canada; Easter when my niece was 2 years old; The excitement and temperature at High school Homecoming football games; Getting burgled; Planting a tree; or just how it felt to sit on my sofa in Stevens Point, Brooklyn, Queens,  or Harrogate.

I would imagine most people have memories but tonight I cannot turn them off. So I’ll write about them.

Some more memories that are popping into my head:

• Painting myself black for an art project.
• Visiting Coney Island... I remember EVERY time and who I went with or why I went
• Making a Lion mosaic from pieces of paper, I particularly liked the mane.
• Visually tracing the bulletin board my 2^nd grade teacher made white a movie was playing instead of watching the movie.
• Making Mexicali soup in a crockpot in 3^rd grade.
• Playing first chair next to Leah Schneider and Erik Mackey.
• Getting Micky D’s before basketball practice in 7^th Grade
• Running with the NiddValley Road Runners on a wet rainy night.
• My 30^th Birthday and everyone there and everything they said (well to some extent).
• A Jingle Bell necklace my godfather gave to me as a gift when I was young. I broke it and was so sad because I thought it was the most beautiful thing. I still kept it because I thought it was beautiful but I never got to wear it. 
• Hailing a taxi in front of Penn Station in the Pouring rain, soaked from head to toe, in my black dress with no shoes on.
• My very first taxi ride in NYC from the plane at JFK to the apartment in Brooklyn. I got seriously carsick but was so excited to have just moved to NY that it didn’t matter.
• The best night in the UN Millennium Plaza hotel after a Knicks game.
• Kayaking with Matt Stengl down the Eau Clair River.
• Finding out I inspired someone to become an artist.
• Breaking up with my very first best friend in second grade. I still feel sad about that.
• Driving to Lagos with Lisa and finding the sea.
• Seeing sun beams shine down on the Acropolis.

I suppose that’s enough for now or I will be awake all night. Hopefully writing about it will allow me to sleep for now. I’ve also realized I have lived a very good and privileged life. And for that I’m really grateful.

Also, I am about to create new memories, so maybe that’s why I’m thinking about the past so much.  I’m going on my very first hen do!!!! It’s the British version of a bachelorette party but slightly different. We are going to York and I’m really looking forward to meeting and getting to know more people better. I love people and I love making new friends. SO, I’m possibly just excited.

Well here I go again to try to sleep, wish me luck. xxx

Things that I love.

I haven’t had much time to reflect on life and what I love about it due to a busy work schedule but tonight I finally have a moment to relax and reflect.

Today was a traditional English day in that it rained. I had anticipated more rain than sunshine but the change in weather was an appreciated one and it became sunny all afternoon.

I live on the top floor of an apartment building and my day started out with pouring rain that slowly woke me up. I couldn't help but think “this is great! There is no obligation for me to enjoy the weather, I will make the most of it.” I got up and planned for a day of the gym, reading a book and absolutely and utterly relaxing in the evening.

Recently, there has been a campaign in the UK called “Love Life.” It’s all about healthy products from Waitrose. I work in the food industry and this campaign is all the rage right now but that isn’t really what is inspiring me. At various moments in my life I find myself thinking “I love life.” Maybe I’m not the only one?

Anyway, for personal gratification and reflection I’m posting this list of the things in life that I love. It’s not exhaustive and I hope you, whomever you are reading this, also have things in life that you love.

I love:

Rainy days where you can cuddle in bed and read a book

The sun in England

Watching a seagull circle a town

Politeness of others & being friendly to others

Friends

Family

A job well done/ accomplishment

A cool breeze on a hot day

The blue sky

The smell of home

The sound of familiar voices

The sound of ocean waves crashing

Family histories

Scary stories and great books

Tea in England and Coffee in the US

A long hard run

A long hot bath

Convenient mistakes

Human kindness

Fresh flowers

Being Barefoot

Falling asleep as a passenger in a car

Seeing two people in love (young or old)

Finding money in a pair of jeans you haven’t worn in a while

Watching the ground disappear on takeoff

Watching the ground come closer when landing

Catching up with friends and family

Relating with other human beings

And waking up happy.

Where Have All the Americans Gone?

Hello to all the Americans, I miss a lot of you.

I've been in England for 19 months now and slowly I'm losing touch with my American-ness. I notice when someone else is speaking with an American accent, I purchased a teapot to have tea the right way (brewed in a pot not per glass), I'm starting to "get" the references to British Pop-culture and when I watch American movies I'm starting to think "why are they driving on the wrong side of the ... oh yeah."

I haven't lost the American accent. I'm just as Wisconsin as ever but words like lovely and brilliant have crept into my vocab. I have been corrupted with DVDs like Nighty Night, Gavin and Stacey, Marion & Geoff, League of Gentlemen, etc. Oh, and I finally understand the "Oh!, What's Occurin' " thing that they do on the radio.

For the past few months I've been on a little roller coaster with jobs and apartments but I'd have to say I'm very lucky to be in England, and I'm happy to be learning the culture. And finally, I think my roller coaster has stopped in the station to exchange passengers and I'll be hopping off for now.

For the past year I was on a Maternity cover role when I worked for Asda and as it was coming to an end I didn't know what my future held. Where do I live? Do I go back to Wisconsin? New York? etc. There were several paths I could have taken and surpisingly more than I had even hopped for. But I'm happy to say I'm not moving to Australia just yet, I am staying in England and I'm very happy to have taken a job with Morrisons.

For those who don't know, Asda and Morrisons are competitors so when I gave my notice I was literally escorted off the premises. It was done in the nicest of ways however it's the first time I've been escorted off anyone's premises. After you are used to going to the same place day after day, it's a bit strange and sad to be told you are no longer allowed there anymore.

I'm not complaining, just reflecting... but anyway, I was put on Garden leave. Basically it's a time where I needed to remain available to work for Asda but they did not want me at work and I could not work for anyone else until my notice period was complete. So yeah, time off. Sounds great, right? Well, for anyone who knows me, they know I don't do well with sitting around and doing nothing. Garden leave means you can stay at home but I wasn't exactly allowed to go on holiday or leave the country.

So for the month of April I was in Wales and it was absolutely lovely. I learned how to cover and tar a flat roof, reclaim old bricks and build a brick wall, and how to cut and put up plasterboard. I even did a little gardening on my garden leave. And I was only two blocks from the sea with a sandy beach! You'll never hear me complain of the lovely sound seagulls and waves make.

Oh, and I totally watched the Royal Wedding in my PJs. It was great. I was ready to get dressed at 1pm but they hadn't kissed yet and how can you watch the whole thing without seeing them kiss??? So I held strong and waited the extra half-hour for a smooch on the balcony. It was... kind of worth it.

I'm back at full time work now. I'm just getting used to the change of location and learning the ropes as the new girl but I'm very excited about my new job. I cannot say much more than that... Just know that I'm super happy and I just might get to do a little traveling for work (NYCers I may be knocking on your doors soon).

My first day of work at M's

Other than that, I've given up my gym membership and am looking for a new one near my new job. Until the time comes, the weather has warmed up and I can run outside plus I've found Argos and all of the amazing home-gym equipment I need. I've now got my kettle bells and a yoga/pilates mat.

I do still miss a lot of American things & I had a little cry about being home-sick this weekend. I miss knowing what laundry detergent I normally buy when I go into the grocery store (here I just buy what's on sale and then get it home and hate it). I miss all of my friends and family (that is the #1 thing I miss). And I miss not paying 50 quid for gas/petrol (it's soooo expensive here).

But I'm not ready to go stateside just yet. Until I am, I'll be exploring the UK and what beauties the motherland has to hold.

We went exploring and found this old ship that used to be an amusement park/ship, cool.

No More Dead Ends

I'm totally stoked today. I just cut my own hair and it does not suck.

I've trimmed my own hair before but never given myself a real hair cut.

I am becoming a seasoned hair cutter. Every Sunday is haircut day for Eric. Instead of using a barber he has--conveniently for him--trained me to give him a nice clean man cut. I've gotten used to using clippers and I think I even do a decent fade. However, I'm a girl so unless I want to look like a boy I've got to use different techniques when cutting my hair.

Eric helped me last time and gave me a decent cut. It was pretty standard but clean and looked better with less dead gross dyed ends. The bangs got a little over cut last time. I take full credit and I persevered with a few bobby pins until they were long enough to let down.

So today I decided I needed a new do. I'm trying to grow out the disgusting dyed blonde hairs and cut them off. I'm about halfway so I can't quite get rid of all of them and I do not look nice with a bob. I weighed all my options and got a pair of scissors, well two pairs of scissors. An hour later, voila! I'm super stoked that I cut my own hair today. There are still some dead gross dyed ends that remain but now they look a little bit nicer and I've gotten rid of a whole dustpan full of grossness.

Woot.

1 Week ago: My hair was out of control!!! Gross.


Today: Post haircut

What's for dinner? Detox Night 4

I'm just not as inspired tonight. I had a long day and was the last one to leave work tonight. So, when getting home I just wanted to eat and not do anything.

With that said, it wasn't a bad dinner by any means and I managed to get slightly creative when putting it all together. But it was more of a standard "I just need to eat" dinner.

The menu:
Detox Scallop Paella
Although I could have gone with rice, it would have taken too long to make and tonight's dinner was about quick and easy. So it's a Quinoa paella with scallops, parsnips, carrots and broccoli. Topped with red onions and served with a avocado slices.
After the blueberry passion fruit with mint last night, I am pretty excited about making desserts that are satisfying yet healthy. They'll never be similar to a bowl of ice cream but I'd like to think that my desserts are a bit more posh and would possibly cost more in a restaurant. Anyway, tonight I went with a soy banana-passion fruit smoothie with frozen blueberries and mint leaves.

Time for bed!